Are you someone looking for signs of an unhealthy relationship? Are you dealing with relationship stress alone?
Relationships are part of our life, but what happens when we become too dependent on someone and this dependency turns out to be unhealthy for our mental health?
In this blog, I am going to talk about some signs that can help you identify your relationship stage and enable you to take the necessary steps at the right time.
5 Signs Of An Unhealthy Relationship
I was always the giver in my relationship. I gave way too much out of what I had in myself and when things ended, I felt empty and it created a void within me. I felt suffocated almost daily.
What I thought was healthy, completely turned out to be unhealthy for me after 8 years. WHY? Because I never paid attention to the patterns I was creating in my relationship and now when I pause and reflect, I clearly understand where I went wrong.
Relationships always suffer due to ego, ignorance, poor communication, and attitude problems. Over the period, you realize, you are banging your head over a thick wall, ultimately hurting yourself.
#1. You are always the giver
One of the toxic signs of an unhealthy relationship, because you are madly in love and you are so blinded by that beautiful picture of a happy relationship that you are ready to do anything to keep your bond stronger.
It is said that love should be unconditional, but we miss to stress upon a fact here, that it should be unconditional from both the ends, only then true love blooms.
If you are the giver in your relationship, after a point of time you reach a level where you no longer are left to offer anything, you feel so empty but since you have created your place as a giver, you fail to match the expectations, and there begins the problem.
Solution: Balance your transaction, yes love is an emotional transaction, make sure it doesn’t turn out to be taxing too much on your mental health.
#2. You prioritize his/her happiness over yours
I won’t call it the biggest mistake though, but we often find ourselves putting our lover/ spouse/bf/gf first, isn’t it? Maybe we are conditioned that way, he first, family first, house first, kids first, and what about us?
What about my mental health, if I am not sane if all the mess in my life is creating a traffic jam inside my little head, how will I be able to move this vehicle called life without getting stroked?
Solution: Prioritise your mental health, pause and reflect, evaluate your stature. Make necessary shifts, alter a few things based upon what is bothering you.
#3. You go out of the way to make things happen
One of the major toxic signs of an unhealthy relationship, here you go – you will do anything to make it up for things, to keep your promises, to maintain that perfect picture, you will pressurize yourself and do anything and everything to make him/her happy.
What will all this leave you with, if you are not being reciprocated with the same love, compassion, and care? You will feel unhappy after a certain point in time, you will even start doubting your own efforts.
Solution: I feel a balance of being perfectly imperfect might help in such a situation, allowing yourself to be human who can make mistakes, who can fail but learn from it, could help.
#4. You are always available
Emotionally, physically, mentally, and financially. Did you know that setting boundaries are considered to be very healthy in every relationship? Now, you might think, come on, what boundaries with my life partner?
Can you pour from an empty cup? Do you know what the future holds for you? Are you life-ready? Keep a part of yourself to yourself, repeat this while you read it.
Solution: Protect your peace. Be there, fulfill all your duties, try to strike a balance but also step-out, take timely breaks, let things take their own due course.
#5. You never say ‘NO”
Another one of the prominent signs of an unhealthy relationship is that just because you want him/her to be happy you fail to refuse, you fail to say NO to things you don’t like to do or don’t enjoy at all. This becomes a habit in the long run and by now your partner is used to this pattern created by you.
Now, if you try to break it, you are mean, you are acting out. Your partner never takes a NO for any situation and in this process, you whittle yourself way too much.
Solution: Setting boundaries and prioritizing help, but if it is done right from the beginning.
In the end, I would say that every relationship is an act of adjustments, shifts, alterations, balance, and understanding. But the most important point to be noted here is, all this should be an equal contribution from both the person involved.
When a partner forgets his/her role-play whole life drama begins to lose its essence. So these were a few signs of an unhealthy relationship that could cause a lot of mental stress if not taken care of.
Life is meant to be lived, and you must have full control over your life. Reflect and evaluate what works and if a few things are not working, find out how to make things work differently. Keep going. Rise Up!
Priyanka Nair is the author of 26 Days 26 Ways for a Happier you and Ardhaviram. An NLP practitioner and Founder of Sanity Daily, helping you prioritize your mental health. Let’s build a happy community.