How to deal with a partner suffering from anxiety? Does this question bother you? Do you feel agitated looking at your partner’s behavior?

It will be very unrealistic if I say that these things are normal and you got to be strong, rather I will say that anxiety and any form of mental illness are like invisible wounds that the sufferer carries inside them it starts affecting others due to their mysterious behavior and approach towards the day to day life.

We get irritated and feel overwhelmed, but we also need to take care of our partner who is suffering from anxiety and makes him/her feel safe and calm. Due to the societal conditioning and lack of awareness, not many understand the repercussions of such illness. In this blog, I will help you understand, how to deal with a partner suffering from anxiety.

How to deal with a partner suffering from anxiety?

When we share a part of ourselves with someone, we unknowingly give the key to our happiness to them, and now our whole life entirely depends upon the way they deal with us or vice versa. Whether you are in love with your partner or it’s just a monotonous affair but when either of you has anxiety issues, it does affect your relationship.

The one who is dealing with a partner with anxiety issues and the one who is actually having a really hard time dealing with the anxiety. It doesn’t matter if you are married to somebody with anxiety or simply dating them, but it matters when it starts taking a toll over your pleasant relationship. You can choose to stay and help your partner overcome the stress or you could simply abandon them, which will make it more difficult for them to take it.

It is believed that in the majority of such cases are a result of the dysfunctional and uncordial marriages, but how to deal with a partner suffering from anxiety and yet stay normal with them? How to just get away with it or how to even make them feel comfortable? Let us try to discuss some meaningful ways.

How to deal with a partner suffering from anxiety

Let us understand your partner’s anxiety issues here:

Anxiety could range from general anxiety to chronic, to social anxiety to panic attacks. It the early intervention and awareness about this illness which is of prime importance leaving all the ego and other things aside to save your marriage and your sanity. 

Anxiety could be Generalized to chronic.
Anxiety disorders are highly treatable, but people are too embarrassed to seek medical treatment.
Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illness in the U.S., affecting 40 million adults.
Anxiety disorder could be a result of various factors like genetics, a trait of personality, and life events.
Anxiety could last for a few days or for several years.

Dating somebody with anxiety?

How to deal with a partner suffering from anxiety if you are dating them? In a dating period, you hardly get to know each other, it’s a matter of time you discover things about each other and when one of you suffers from mental distress and issues like anxiety, things become a little different here. The whole idea of dating includes having dinner nights, mini-vacations, movie nights, gatherings with friends and spending a lot of quality time together. Things turn out nasty when you find your partner withdrawing from social events and prefer to stay at home.  A perfect mood killer, may sound to you but there could some underlying issue, we need to gauge.

  • Maybe your partner is struggling hard to catch up with daily routine work.
  • They feel anxious all the time.
  • Having different mood swings, which again bothers you and you lose your temper.a
  • Afraid of getting judged and criticized by others.
  • Avoiding social gatherings.

Married to somebody with anxiety?

How to deal with a partner suffering from anxiety if you are married? Anxiety can affect your marriage and make communication between you two very cumbersome. It really becomes very difficult for someone to put themselves in the shoes of the other partner who is having anxiety issues and handle them. Anxiety is a way to respond to the body’s stress, but it becomes crucial when it can impact your relationships. The series of arguments and insensitivity only make it worse for the sufferer. Understand your partner and try to come to a solution for your peace of mind. To understand, below are a few general symptoms that could also turn into chronic pain if not paid early attention.

  • They fail to express their needs and fulfill yours because they are already dealing with a lot inside them.
  • It becomes difficult to explain their thoughts and emotions.
  • Excessive worrying becomes a part of their life.
  • Fear and panic become common to them, which makes you feel irritated.
  • Social anxiety is another issue they deal with.
  • They seek validation from others.

Seven ways to deal with the anxiety of your partner

Whether you are dating somebody with anxiety or married to the one, by now you know how anxiety looks like or feels to the one. What role you could play to help your partner in overcoming their anxiety issues. Now when you have read and understood the symptoms and by any chance, you strike any resemblance with your partner’s behavior and above-mentioned symptoms. How to deal with a partner suffering from anxiety? Just take things in your stride and trust me the road ahead will be easy for you and your partner. In the end, I believe we all want a happy married life, which is not a myth, it is us, the partners who instead of holding each other’s back, stop caring and give up on each other. 

You are married to someone with anxiety, this mental illness could have been their underlying for years even before marriage or could have been developed after marriage. It could be due to you or your parents, we all know about the in-law’s troubles. 

You are dating someone, you have just met the person and you are already having a really hard time dealing with their emotional rides. In both cases, the person who is dealing with such a neurological imbalance could not be blamed in any situation. It is already very hard for them to get up and show up every day, all they need is inclusion apart from acceptance.

1. Choose your words carefully
2. Take a pause before you react
3. Give yourself sometime
4. Listen mindfully
5. Try to be there
6. Take about available options
7. Seek Counselling

1. Choose your words carefully

Your partner might be having a burnout, feeling jittery and panicky. You may not find it reasonable and say things that will only pull all the triggers and things blow out of proportion for both of you. Don’t do that please, I understand we unconsciously and unknowingly say things we don’t mean but a person who is dealing with such issues takes everything at heart and overthinks about it, which will only make it worse.

2. Take a pause before you react

It is quite natural and easy to lose your cool when you feel overwhelmed and fail to understand something. Before you yell, shout or scream at your partner for not attending the public gathering with you or a family dinner, try to talk first, many problems could be sorted out simply by talking politely and respectfully but we humans are programmed in a manner that we choose the other way round and forget the consequences of our words.

3. Give yourself sometime

Mini vacation, weekend trips or wellness retreats are the best escape from daily life’s difficulties. Time to time, you both should go out for small vacations, weekend getaways or a long trip if possible, it will help to re-kindle, reunite and rejuvenate. Sometimes things look really tough when we stay in a constant negative zone, step out of it for a while, work can wait, other things can be re-scheduled but your health and relationship should be your priority.

4. Listen mindfully

Staying mindful means to see things as it is, without questioning or judging it. How to deal with a partner suffering from anxiety? Be mindful and an active listener first. Most of the time we just hear and we do not listen and try to understand those unsaid words and underlying emotions, be an active listener and maybe that is all needed for the given moment.

5. Try to be there

So you planned to stay together for life, how about fixing things together? Life could be a beautiful thing to rejoice, right? Leaving all the logic, reasoning and questions, how about understanding the underlying issue and think about a coping mechanism? A mechanism that will not only help your partner but also help your marriage to sustain beautifully.

6. Take about available options

From talking, being there, taking them to vacations, to seeking medical help. Either you can help your spouse by talking to her/him on a daily basis to track their mood and triggers or you can surely seek help from certified practitioners. Trust me it is absolutely normal to seek counseling in such cases, there is a lot of stigmas attached to mental illness but we have to choose what works for us and not go with the societal parameters.

7.Seek Counselling

Because you need a doctor when you are physically unwell likewise you need a doctor when you are mentally unhealthy, not a big deal. If you feel things have gone beyond your control and your partner’s anxiety issues are making your day to day life difficult to deal with, you can certainly seek couple counseling or marriage counseling. Sometimes when seeing things from someone’s else perspective and unbiased views we understand things in a better form and that clarity is indeed needed in such a case, so take your call and intervene early.

 

Before I end this blog here, I request whoever is reading this to please take such issues seriously and try to reach the core problem, sometimes there could be no reason at all and things turn out to be very unreasonable for you but maybe they need help. There are cases when people have tried to take their life or go into complete isolation and it all starts someday silently right in the front of our eyes.
I would insist that please take care and pay attention to your loved ones, you never know what they are dealing with inside them. The biggest battle we fight is most of the time the fight we fight against us daily, to make it even with life, To show ourselves and try to be in life. We are almost daily on the verge of giving up, suppressing our suicidal thoughts, doubting ourselves and thinking of ways to self-harm. Just imagine a little patience and help from a loved one can help prevent a tragedy and bring life back in its original state. Is it too much to ask for? Think about it.

 

Sanity Daily

About the Author

I am Priyanka Joshi Nair and am on a mission to help women lead happier lives after marriage.

Sanity daily

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