Saving your relationship with positivity might sound cliche but a little bit of positivity can go a long way in any relationship. It will at least gives strength to hold on and make things work.
We often stress upon being positive, taking things positively, reacting positively towards any situation in life and we are often blamed of being vulnerable but when it comes to the relationship many of us rather maximum of us try our best to make things work even if they are in our most negative zone we try to turn towards positivity to bring some light in our relationship.
In this blog, let’s see how we can save our relationship by adopting a positive approach.
Saving your relationship with positivity: The mindful way
Many of us who are dating someone or are married come across many such situations in the relationship which makes them anxious, stressed, annoyed, and agitated. We feel irritated and sometimes even think of taking some huge steps to come out of a relationship as it starts costing our health and mental peace.
But if you look at it as a third person like we usually are capable of giving advice to others because when we see things from a distance we observe and then we try to give some suggestions for improvement. The same things can be done for our relationship also. I agree there are moments when we lose our control even I have been through the same situation but I realized this one thing that when we sit back in another room introspecting or evaluating ourselves we always know the core reason of the argument and fights, the core issue behind the problems is right there.
Sometimes it is our ego or sometimes it is our choice to stay ignorant that we prefer not to address the issue and continue being the same which only causes more stress in a relationship. So does saving your relationship with positivity work? Let us see some useful ways which can surely help you overcome a negative situation in your relationship.
10 ways of Saving your relationship with positivity
I’m not a therapist neither I’m someone who is a master in this skill, like many of you I have been through a series of stressful situations in my life, and sometimes it is said that the personal experiences and experiences of people around us are enough to give us some insights to help ourselves and when we share the learnings of her life to others I think it is helpful for them too.
How can we stop being anxious in our relationship and try to work on ourselves, can we overcome stressful relationships with a little bit of positivity? With this thought, I am going to provide you with 10 useful ways which have helped me and I’m sure a few of them will help you too.
|3.) Friends first|
|5.) Pay attention|
|8.) Active listening|
|9.) No comparison|
Communication is the key. The first step for saving your relationship with positivity. The more you talk, the more you convey how you feel about each other or a particular situation, the more it gets clearer for you both. If your partner is an extreme introvert and he hardly conveys how he feels about you or certain things, it is bound to create a lot of confusion in understanding and results in distress in the relationship.
Convey how you feel, speak about what you like and what you don’t like about them, and let them know how important they are for you, open communication is very essential as it helps and creates a positive and lovable environment.
Like I said communication is the key and keeping the communication rolling is an art which one of you should master. It will not come mechanically, for most of us it comes naturally but understanding the nature of your relationship and for bridging the communication gap between you two, you should engage often.
For saving your relationship with positivity, have meaningful conversations, discuss childhood, secret desires, and create a wish list together. Engage often, start a conversation, sit with a relaxed mind, and talk about general pieces of stuff, it helps to relax and navigate us towards a different direction to think and talk about.
3.) Friends first
This approach has worked for me, even when the wife in me was annoyed the friend in me was talking to my husband, I know it sounds complicated or confusing but before getting along together as a couple we were good friends and we carried that relation till date even when we are not seeing each other as husband-wife, we look after each other as friends and that has helped to maintain composure at the house.
We all seek appreciation, compliments, validation in a relationship, it somehow acts as a rewarding factor for most of us. Acknowledgment is one of those 3 A’s in the relationship, Acceptance, Appreciation, and Acknowledgement. A simple thank you, a warm hug, and a special note of love work miracles eases one down and helps them renew.
Acknowledgment is a very important aspect of saving your relationship with positivity but often the most difficult part here is people often forget to do little things in order to go behind the larger picture. Start recognizing and appreciating all the efforts made by your partner for saving your relationship with positivity and bring some more light into it.
5.) Pay attention
Are we really paying attention to our loved ones? Especially in today’s world when we are so drenched in our internet world, we watch videos, we read stuff, watch movies and do so many things online that we forget to pay attention to real-life happening around us. Please time out things, make time for everything, and be present 100 % at that moment, it will make a lot of difference.
Evaluation is like that old medicine which helps us to get back to our original state but only if we are willing to. We hardly evaluate our own self while we are busy pointing our fingers at others, others might be wrong and would have done miserable things but sometimes a self-evaluation gives an altogether positive approach to think and see things. This way we also try to be a hundred percent at the moment and do our best to make things work.
Self-introspection. For saving your relationship with positivity, I insist we all do it more often, evaluation and introspection go hand in hand, and when you introspect or self-examine yourself before judging or evaluating your partner you might get a clearer vision. You might get answers to most of your questions but only with a positive mind unshielded with ego and grudges.
8.) Active listening
We hear but do we listen and do we listen actively since I am a mental health advocate, I see a huge gap in this practice. We hear to speak, we listen but we have to speak first, tell our story, share our piece of unsolicited advice and suggestions. Active listening plays a vital role in saving your relationship with positivity. There are times when your partner needs you to understand his/her silence, it could be tricky but not impossible you just have to be active and be present for them.
9.) No comparison
Never compare what you have with others and never condemn what you don’t have. One’s chapter ten can’t be your chapter twenty or chapter five. Every person has traveled through their own path and has faced their shares of difficulties. So what makes the whole difference? So saving your relationship with positivity is possible? Absolutely but only if we are willing to let go of our mind trap and be mindful.
Connect mindfully, be there, be aware, and be present. Help each other, look out for each other. After some time of being together we stop doing things which we used to do before and somehow to start taking each other for granted, we become used to or accustomed bit then comes days when we need coping aid and it starts showing a lack of appearance in the relationship and it is the time all the negativity starts creeping in, take charge to replace it with positive elements. Be open to communicate and connect.
I am not a relationship expert but have been through heaven and hell, have seen sunshine and dark nights both. I know how it feels and what it lacks or takes to keep that light shining. But we can only work on ourselves. Try to mend things from our end, do our best to bring out positivity in our relationship. So keep doing your bit it will only help you to save your sanity and be the guiding light in your relationship.
Things take their own due course to take shape and with your effort and positive approach things will surely turn in your favor, maybe not in the way you desired but in the long run we all get the answers. No matter how cliche staying positive sounds but at least it puts hope and strength within us which is harmless.
Love and light
Priyanka Nair is the author of 26 Days 26 Ways for a Happier you and Ardhaviram. An NLP practitioner and Founder of Sanity Daily, helping you prioritize your mental health. Let’s build a happy community.