How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman? How do I manage my family, work, and yet balance my inner space? How do I be available for everyone and maintain my own mental state?
Women are often expected to be perfect managers, an organized people, and high performers when it comes to adhering to all the responsibilities like household chores, looking after family members, work-life balance and even maintaining the harmony of the house.
How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman when I have so much stress/pressure on my shoulders? In this blog, let us try to discuss various aspects of stress triggers in a woman’s life and try to find some handy solutions for them.
How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman?
Anxiety issues are not just a sudden outburst of a particular situation, it has been there with you for a while, and various sources are responsible for your anxiety issues. A woman could be blamed for being vulnerable, for reacting. She is often labeled as a drama-queen or victim-player. Little do others know that she might need help: she is screaming for help from inside, she might be facing burnout. She might be on the verge of giving up. But who cares.
Our society has also contributed to women’s distress on a larger level. Right from education, workplace, and living with in-laws. Women have been a subject of domination and playing unequal. I do not propose any feminism theory here neither I support such concepts, but one cannot deny the fact the woman has been the center of every issue here and there and have been very much at the suffering end.
How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman when I am expected to meet all the set standards? As a woman, even I have different roles to play and I want to keep everyone happy. I want to do everything right, I want to be an apple of my husband’s eyes and a role model for my kid. I want to be respected by my in-laws and loved by my parents. I also want to excel in my career and mark my space. But is it possible for a person to excel in every role they play and when it comes to a woman there is this unknowing pressure of performance of attaining excellence in everything they do?
Then comes a part where women are jealous of other women, they compare their lifestyles and loath over things they could not do another reason for a lot of anxiousness and self-sabotage.
Also Read: Is your Mother in Law Causing you Mental Stress?
12 ways for a woman to cope up with her anxiety issues
Anxiety is our body’s natural way to react to stress. It makes us uncomfortable, we observe rapid heartbeat, a sense of fear, and panic. Every person has got different triggers and identifying those triggers could be crucial but it is very important to take responsibility for your state and act accordingly because a state of any mental illness will not only impact your relationship but your physical health also.
How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman, when no one takes me seriously? It is tough for people around us to believe that mental health does impact physical health and that too in ways one cannot imagine and believe, rather question doubt, and even make fun of. But it is a proven fact, and we need to take care before it is too late. Here are a few handy and useful ways for all the women out there to take charge of their life and start nurturing their inner selves.
Here are my 12 gentle reminders for the woman who needs to hear this:
|1.) No negative self-talk|
|2.) No self-doubt|
|3.) Understand your capacity|
|4.) Stop blaming yourself|
|5.) Focus on what matters|
|6.) Selflove is not selfish|
|7.) Invest in yourself|
|8.) Start exercising|
|9.) Eat good|
|10.) Indulge in self-care|
|11.) Practice gratefulness|
|12.) Ask for HELP|
1.) No negative self-talk
We tend to say a lot of bad things to ourselves, we speak in a negative manner with our inner self. Will we ever do it with someone else who is already stressed? Will we play with someone else’s space of mind with a negative bandwagon? No! Then why do we do it ourselves? Especially women, it happens with them when they fail to give it back to their arrogant in-laws or when they feel that they failed to meet other’s expectations. You need to understand that it is alright to fail sometimes and it is absolutely normal to not be loved by everyone.
2.) No self-doubt
When days are dark and nights are low when things don’t go the way it was supposed to be you start cribbing and blaming yourself. Do you realize that when you belittle yourself you create a room for others to intervene and contribute to belittling you furthermore? Self-doubt is a silent killer and as a woman or caregiver, when you have been fulfilling so many responsibilities of your family you just cannot doubt your intentions and your own efforts. So gear up after every fall you face.
3.) Understand your capacity
We all are programmed in a certain manner. We have our own limitations and capacities. We cannot go beyond them. Period. We go out of our comfort zone to make things work, to make others happy, to make our spouse, our kids happy but in the end, we are simply building a habit, a habit of being there always, being emotionally available for all of them, but what about you? You stretch way too long and somehow it instills expectations in you and that hurts you. Please do things in your capacity, it is ok even if you are not perfect, but you need to be happy.
4.) Stop blaming yourself
How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman? Stop blaming yourself. You can’t have everything in place. Sometimes it is ok to let things take their own shape. How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman? If you are a married woman who feels responsible for everything going around in her family, which is a good thing, also keep in mind that it is not your job alone, it does demand other family member’s attention and intervention also.
In order to keep things running, you are bound to step on the wrong chords, wrong decisions but you cannot blame yourself for trying and putting in efforts.
5.) Focus on what matters
When we are hit by a large amount of stress, we often feel clouded and fail to see a bright side, which is normal. In order to move ahead in life, we need to set our priorities right, we need to focus on what brightens up and what matters to us the most. How can we release our tension and stress when we will be constantly looking in the same direction? Doing things, talking about things that cause us stress will only lead to an increase in your anxiety levels, give yourself a mindful break and segregate, de-clutter your mind.
6.) Selflove is not selfish
How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman? By indulging in some self-care activities. It is often believed that women who care for themselves or look after their needs first are selfish but it is not true, self-care could be a way of self-persevering yourself. Anyone could do it, rather should do it. We need strength from inside to outshine from outside. When we are happy and at peace from our inner-self it radiates on our outer space and we spread positivity around us.
7.) Invest in yourself
It is never too late to follow your hobbies or your passion. It is never too late to near and develops a new skill. Procrastination is a time thief, it doesn’t allow you to take that immediate action, I request you to break the chains and come out of your comfort zone and trust me this struggle will bring the best out of you. When you advance in a new skill when you follow something you love to do, you find a new purpose and you enjoy some parts of your life which are helpful enough to rise with a smile every day.
8.) Start exercising
The most underrated practice. We usually switch to a wellness routine only when we want to reduce weight but let me tell you your body needs continuous repair from inside and exercise of any form, be it walking, yoga, pranayama, or pilates, Zumba gives you strength and connects you with yourself. It helps you build stamina and boosts your immunity which eventually helps you fight anxiety and depression. Try it.
9.) Eat good
I well-balanced diet is the key. I will not ask you to switch to a vegan profile but yes a little bit of alteration in your eating habits could do wonders for your physical health. For example; consumption of caffeine is very common but it increases anxiety levels and for some, it also leads to sleep problems. If you notice such triggers do avoid consuming those food items.
10.) Indulge in self-care
When I talked about self-love above, I had to bring out the aspect of self-care which includes taking full responsibility for yourself. Getting yourself a regular check, routine check-ups, not avoiding any signs of illness, and not leading yourself to a point of burnout. How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman? Take breaks, slow down, take rest and hold on for a while but do not take your health lightly, after all, you would be able to raise a healthy family only when you are in good health, so please think about it.
11.) Practice gratefulness
When you will start counting your blessing you will realize you have a lot to cherish. For me even getting seven hours of sleep is a source of bliss, when I get a cab in time and if I have enough food in my kitchen to feed my whole family, I feel grateful. The problem with human nature is that the things that are available in abundance and with ease are taken for granted by us but there are people who are deprived of such basic needs. Just change your direction and you will have a lot of things to be grateful for.
12.) Ask for HELP
When you feel too tired and you have no idea what to do to help yourself, reach out to self-help groups or you can even get in touch with a counselor who will listen to you non-judgmentally. Seeking help is still thought of as the last option or no option at all due to the very less awareness and acceptance of mental health issues but you know what you need and when you need it. So take that step for your betterment leaving everything aside.
How do I cope up with anxiety as a woman and live a happy life? Start by owning your life, take its full responsibility. No one will give you the power, will have to take it, and remember as Dr. A.P.J Abdul Kalam said, Difficulties in our life do not come to destroy us but to bring out the best in us and let difficulties know that we are difficult. Difficult situations may not last for too long but difficult people would. So just take charge of your life and make it worth it. Lots of love and peace your way.
Love and light
Priyanka Nair is the author of 26 Days 26 Ways for a Happier you and Ardhaviram. An NLP practitioner and Founder of Sanity Daily, helping you prioritize your mental health. Let’s build a happy community.