How can stressed moms manage their children and yet remain stress-free? It’s not the children who bring the stress along with them but the duties and responsibilities of being a mother.
Motherhood is challenging, let’s accept this. It is a never-ending duty and a life-time commitment with your children to train them and support them. In spite of all the challenges, a mother thrives to strive for perfection.
In this blog, let us discuss how can stressed moms manage their children and also take some time for themselves.
How Can Stressed Moms Manage Their Children
The biggest challenge of a mother is to train their children right because societal norms say so. She is responsible for each sign of bad behavior a child shows, if he scores fewer marks, she is held responsible, if he misbehaves with others, she is held responsible and besides this, the entire onus of the household lies on her. How can she live stress-free?
On the other hand, they want to spend a lot of quality time with kids. They never want to pass on their frustration to the kids and even if they do so, they feel overwhelmingly guilty about it.
The joy of motherhood takes a back seat and starts taxing a mother’s sanity with the laden duties. How to take care of yourself in this situation? And how to enjoy this journey of motherhood with your children?
15 Tricks for stressed moms to ease
Here are a few tricks which will serve as a daily reminder for every mom out there. Motherhood is a lot of things and it also includes you, so it’s time you take care of yourself too, only then you will be able to live a sane and balanced life.
Raising your child properly with the rest of the responsibilities of your home is a big challenge in itself, a thing which every mother wants to conquer, let us move ahead by adopting some tips and help a mother to live stress-free. Here are few tips from a mother of seven years old happy girl, fair enough I guess 🙂
|1.) Keep up with your child-like energy|
|2.) Do not take things personally|
|3.) Learn to let go|
|4.) Do not follow the rat race|
|5.) Take small breaks|
|6.) Allow yourself to make mistakes|
|7.) Take your time to do things, don’t rush|
|8.) Not every day will be a happy day|
|9.) Don’t be over-reactive with your kids|
|10.) Have a friendly approach with your kids|
|11.) Do things you love to do|
|12.) Take time to exercise|
|13.) Take time to be grateful|
|14.) Get plenty of sleep|
|15.) Never miss a meal|
1.) Keep up with your child-like energy
How can stressed moms manage their children? By being childlike. As we grow older, we start forgetting the child inside us. Because we have to be matured, we have to handle the world smartly, but whenever we feel tired and sit with life, have you ever wondered why you remember your childhood? Because then you used to live so carefree and stress-free, so never let your inner child loose.
2.) Do not take things personally
Married life comes with a lot of responsibility and trouble. A complete package. A woman becomes a mother later but at first, she has to become a good wife, a good daughter-in-law. Despite living with your in-laws, you can stay stress-free, how? Read here and do not take anyone’s words to heart. Listen and leave it there, only then you will be able to take care of your mental health.
3.) Learn to let go
When we are upset about things around us, we keep it in our hearts because we often have no one to listen to us, the mother’s job is to cook, the mother’s job is to manage the house and such things frustrate us a lot. Yes, but if we carry so much burden, then our health will be affected, then how will we be able to take care of our children? How can stressed moms manage their children? By letting go of negative thoughts that pull us down.
4.) Do not follow the rat race
This world has become an amazing place as if there is an on-going race, everyone is running but no one knows the exact destination. Do not be a part of this crowd and make your own way, do not put such unwanted pressure on your children and yourself, let them find their own way, just keep looking at them. Direct them, be their guide.
5.) Take small breaks
During her daily routine work, the mother does not get even a little time for herself, and then by the evening it is natural to feel tired, in such a situation, taking some time for herself could help her. Take a small break of 5 minutes, go and wash your face, drink water, listen to any of your favorite music while cooking, listen to the radio, or put on an earphone listen to a Ted talk. Such small things will help you not to feel stressed
6.) Allow yourself to make mistakes
How can stressed moms manage their children? By allowing ourselves to make mistakes, by not rationalizing everything and judge ourselves. When we judge our own capacities of doing things we weaken our energy. As a mother even you are learning daily, sometimes we even learn from our children, like I have learned to be patient after becoming a mother.
7.) Take your time to do things, don’t rush
I have seen my mother rushing throughout the day as if she is accomplishing a task and in the end, someone will be there to clap for her, what’s the rush maa? I say, and she looks so pressurized, so time-bound all the time. Time pressure is one of the universal stressors, but it hits some parents hard. They get panicky if they are late, they get anxious if their children come home late and they pass this anxiety in their children too. Breath in breath out, please.
8.) Not every day will be a happy day
Like the sun and moon are completely inevitable, sadness and happiness are unavoidable too. We enjoy all the happiest moments and just when one stressful event occurs we lose break of things, we start cursing our life. Mothers have always been labeled as melodramatic and making a big deal out of everything because they always want happiness and peace in their house, which is a good thing to ask for, but somedays will be dark too and it is about our ability to handle stress in those days that will give the existing situation a new angle and through this, we will teach our kids to handle life effectively too.
9.) Don’t be over-reactive with your kids
Some parents become too sensitive when their kids are upset, when they lose a game or when they get hurt. On the contrary, some parents are such a control freak that they unknowingly become so harsh to their kids on scoring fewer maks and not winning in a game. In both cases, when a parent becomes over-reactive to the things happening with their kids, the kid gets pressurized and doesn’t learn to accept his feelings.
10.) Have a friendly approach with your kids
This always helps, instead of being a parent, try becoming their emotional coach, keep room for improvement, and learning along with your kids. Make them understand the importance of sharing and expressing how they feel about certain things they see going around them, try to understand their mindset, and to be there for them. The kid feels safe and you feel satisfied.
11.) Do things you love to do
On a personal note, take out some time for inspiration. Follow your passion and do something you love to do. A simple as painting, dancing, and gardening and involve your kids along with you, trust me they will enjoy having fun with you. Make it a habit of doing such things once in a while, record those moments, and preserve those memories.
12.) Take time to exercise
Exercise is most underrated and is shooed away by the majority of mothers with the help of end numbers of excuses. For how long will you be able to be pouring from an empty cup? You need to re-fill right? Exercise is that tool to bring back that lost zing in your life.
13.) Take time to be grateful
How can stressed moms manage their children? By practicing gratitude. By being happy for being able to raise their children, by being thankful to have been able to spend time with children, I know it might sound gross but when we start being grateful for little things we are being able to do and the little things we get in turn of our unconditional love, we start valuing our life, even more, we release negative emotions and make room for more positivity.
14.) Get plenty of sleep
Do not compromise on your sleep. Especially working moms who have to strike a perfect balance at work and home, cut down on their sleep hours to meet all the expectations. But please take care of yourself first then prepare yourself to fulfill the reasonable expectations people have from you.
15.) Never miss a meal
Yes mommy, you can sit with a plate full of food and not leftover food, not hungry face food. You feed your kids with so much love but what about you, who will feed you? How can stressed moms manage their children? By stop ignoring yourself, feed yourself with good food and some chocolates, some guilt-free ice creams, and having a rich diet that too on time. Enjoy meals with your kids. Share food and involve them in your kitchen too. Don’t worry about the mess.
In the end, I would say that release the beliefs which hold you back from living your life. Do not make an excuse to ignore your own health and sanity. Once we become mothers we become stronger, but we also need to understand that a strong woman does not rely on anyone else to take care of her but she takes care of herself so that she can take care of her family in a better way.
Be that woman, and no you will not be labeled selfish, you will be preserving yourself for a better tomorrow. Take care.
Lots of love and gratitude
Priyanka Nair is the author of 26 Days 26 Ways for a Happier you and Ardhaviram. An NLP practitioner and Founder of Sanity Daily, helping you prioritize your mental health. Let’s build a happy community.