There are a lot of things that differentiate human beings from animals. Of course, some biological similarities are there. Yet, the human mind and the ability to connect, nurture, and love makes it more well-groomed. And, when we combine all these characteristics of human beings, relationships come into play. How to cut off from the toxic relationships of your life?
When we hear the word “Relationship”, we get reminded of the people we have in our lives. Relationships play a crucial role in everyone’s world. Whatever we do, directly or indirectly, bends with some sort of validation from the people we have in our surroundings. No doubt, relationships are complex in nature. But, it’s more of our understanding that makes them either messed up or sorted.
When we consist of good and positive relationships in our lives, we blossom, both mentally and physically. But, when it’s the other way around, then things become harsh. Having abusive and toxic relationships can distort our well being in a big way.
Most of the time, it can be hard to spot the negativity and toxicity hidden around, especially in the form of relationships we have.
Why? To be honest, because we don’t want to face the truth. We don’t want to admit that things are not working and will never work. Despite knowing the reality deep down, we keep on trying and putting our energies out there. But what we get is a disappointment, hurt, regret, guilt, and stuff at the end.
That’s why first, we need to understand that toxic relationships are good for nothing. They can’t and won’t bring happiness into your life. In fact, in this whole tussle of negativity and ignorance, we might get too far from ourselves only, and that’s not the bet anyone wants to take. Right?
So, if you are self-aware and conscious enough, it’s not that hard to find out the toxic relationships of your life. Then, how to cut off from the toxic relationships of your life?
Before moving further, please let’s take a look at some of the most evident signs of toxic people-
- Play the victim card every time.
- Never say sorry or apologize.
- Use abusive language and gestures.
- Emotionally drain you always.
- Live in the past.
- 24*7 Negative mindset.
- Like to play blame-game.
Yes, you can add even more characteristics here if you want to.
Now, sit with yourself and think about the people close to you, friends, family, whatever. Try to analyze their behaviour with you, such as how they make you feel, whether they give you wings. Or, chop them whenever you are about to do something greater in life. Go deeper!
How to cut off from the toxic relationships of your life? What are the causes of your misery or your degrading physical or mental health? Question everything you can! You will get your answers ultimately. And, if the answer is your relationships, then it’s high time for you to kick those negative people out of your life.
Yes! I know it’s not easy to let go of certain relationships, even if they are detrimental to your health. Been there, felt that! It is never easy to break all the strings with people who have been a part of your life. And change will bring discomfort, pain, trauma, and hurt in the beginning.
But, you need to understand your mental peace comes first. And having toxic relationships will never let you reach your fullest potential. That’s why it’s crucial for you to not live in ignorance and delusion of things becoming cordial one day. They will not!
Always remember, doing right things with wrong people will never pay off. It’s a complete waste of your energy and mental space.
How To Cut Off From The Toxic Relationships Of Your Life: 5 positive ways
- Acceptance is key-
Yes, you heard it right! Healing starts from acceptance and acknowledgement of the situation in front of you. If you keep denying things, they continue storing in your subconscious. And it will affect your mental health.
That’s why it’s critical for someone to see the reality as it is, accept it, and move forward. So, accept you are dealing with a toxic relationship in your life, and now you have to do something about it.
2. Share your feelings-
Going through toxic relationships is not easy. But, opening up about your feelings is a vital step towards recovery. Talk about your problems with your loved ones, share what you are feeling with them. It will not only make you let your heart out. But also create a sense of support for you.
Don’t try to hide things from people important in your life. Don’t assume you can tackle everything on your own. We all need love and support at difficult times, so do you.
3. Set the boundaries-
One of the biggest mistakes we human beings usually make is we don’t set boundaries when it comes to relationships. We kind of give control of our emotions and feelings to people involved in our lives. That, in turn, leads us to certain complications, perplexities, and sufferings. Thus, creating emotional boundaries with toxic people is of utmost importance.
Like, very recently, the COVID era has taught us about social distancing. That is relevant concerning negative relationships as well. Similarly, emotional distancing is as crucial as social distancing. One should take it seriously.
It can be difficult to maintain social distance from some toxic people because they live with you under the same roof, for instance. But, if you can discover the art of distancing yourself from them emotionally, you can save yourself from a lot of misery.
4. Seek out professional help-
There’s something about professional help that you might not find anywhere else. Without any doubt, talking and sharing your feelings with loved ones will help you. But after some time, it still might be difficult for you to cope with your feelings and emotions.
At that time, professional help comes in to play big time. You should never play ashamed seeking help from professionals. A big no-no! They will go deep into your situations and provide you with practical solutions from very unbiased perspectives. It is impossible to get from some relative or friend or another person.
5. Invest in yourself-
Relationships are great when they serve well for your well being. But, when they start backfiring your existence, then it’s time for you to introspect on them.
In this hustle-bustle of people and relationships around, we often take ourselves for granted and don’t take out any me-time for ourselves. In short, we forgot to live for ourselves. That’s itself a red flag, which one should never ignore. Hence, you should not stop living for yourself.
Individuality is a beautiful virtue. After turning your face from the toxic relationship of your life, it’s crucial for you to again start living from yourself. Start investing in yourself in every possible way you can.
Initially, you might feel awkward, as you have been ignoring yourself for decades. But do what makes you happy, wear your favourite clothes, eat your all-time cuisine, go for a movie, hang out with your loved ones. In a nutshell, do whatever you always wanted to do.
Eventually, time heals everything. It might sound cliché, but it’s true!
Bonus tip for helping you deal with the toxic relationships of your life
Retrospection will help you-
As human beings, it’s easy to bounce back to toxic relationships, as we might judge ourselves or feel self-doubt. But, never forget why you had taken that step in the very first place!
Also, retrospection will help you stand still on your decision. How? After cutting yourself from toxic people in your life, you slowly but steadily begin to notice the change in your life, a sense of calm and peace around.
You can then play out some incidents, though relevant memories of your past and recall how that person snatched the peace and beauty of your life.
Ultimately, you will get the validation of the right decision you have taken of parting your ways with that toxic person.
Relationships are all about nurturing and enhancing your spirit and well being and not reducing your inner self.
But, when relationships start to curb your soul and become a source of constant distress, even after trying your best, then there’s nothing better than cutting them off once for all. It is painful, no doubt about it! But, just ask yourself one thing, is it worth your mental space. Is it worth your entire life? I hope you get your answer, and then you will never look back.
Also, always remember, you are stronger than you think! You deserve better in life. You are born to live in an open sky and not under the shadow of toxic people.
About the Author:
Engineer turned Writer Anam Khan is an ambitious and fierce young lady who wants to heal, entertain, and engage people through her writing. After college, she started her career as a Digital Marketing Associate in 2018 but soon discovered her passion for writing. She is working as a blogger and freelance content writer, collaborating with different businesses, enhancing their digital assets through her content creation. She is passionate about mental health awareness. You can read and feel her passion at Yourwellbeingg.